In Which The President Pops a Spoke

This brilliant account supplied by Warren Billson (aka Spanner)

The weather for the Bright ride the previous week was absolutely perfect. Now that is not a problem unless you have the job of trying to describe the weather for this weeks Thursday ride on the Warby trail. With 28 degrees and the slightest whiff of breeze how can you improve on perfection?

The starting peloton of 5 being Dennis, Crasher, 2 Bob, Litt;e John and Big Al assembled as scheduled at Mt Evelyn and an orderly and efficient manner down the hill and up again to cross the highway at Seville. The next section through to Killara is always a pleasure to ride (mainly because it is downhill). Chris joined in along the way and wheels spun, cogs cogged and dust flew all the way to the Settlement Road sprint, effectively won by somebody but nobody took notice. The day was too good. Ahead a faint blob of yellow gradually grew and grew until it was easy to identify Hooters, Willy Wonka, Spanner and fireman Roy.

Arriving at Millgrove on the upward journey we were forced to maneuver around roadworks, designed no doubt by the Shire council to trip us up. But being the elite group we are we navigated around the 4 trucks, 2 rollers, 2 bobcats and 34 workman standing watching one guy move a of bucket of sand.

Millgrove to Warburton is always nice but with the sun shining, the birds singing and Hooters hooting today was idealist. Arriving back at the Trailblazers café for our afternoon nourishment we were confounded by a deep and meaningful dilemma. We now had assembled a pelaton of 10, but we only had 9 seats. However this was solved as the proprietor quickly came to the rescue with an old wooden monster he stole from under his mother in law in the back of the shop. Big John happily sat on this after whipping of the old persons drool stains on the seat (we think it was drool)

Sitting there enjoying a delightful range of local delicacies many deep questions in life were pondered. Why does Dennis only ever eat salad sandwiches? How do the get such good froth in the cappuccinos? Why do we do this?

Suddenly the buzz of the sawmill next door and the thumping of the councils compactor were shattered by the clip clop of a Shetland pony racing past. Somehow this toy horse had escaped from is paddock by walking under the fence and the commotion of that place at that time caused it to bolt. Resident Vet, Dr Chris, instinctively jumped into action. Was it the noble cause of stopping this distressed animal from injury or was it the chance to get a new patient. We may never know because that was the last we saw of her. The rest of us hoping to assist did ride slowly down the trail following the numerous piles of horse droppings but obviously followed the wrong trail.

As we had lost pelotonic order we reassembled at the Launching Place lights to wait for the missing members. This provided a few minutes to compare stories from school years. A strange pattern emerged. Dennis fell of his bike as a teenager and bumped his head, Wonka fell of his bike as a teenager and bumped his head, Spanner fell off his bike as a teenager and bumped his head. A clear pattern was emerging and it was starting to explain why we do indeed do this!

Suddenly the buzz of the traffic was shattered by a snap crackle and pop. We thought maybe Bob was doing his exercises but this turned out to be our fearless leader’s front wheel. Now sporting a broken spoke, the wheel had more wobbles than an English cricket team. Dennis was quickly on the phone to our resident bike mechanic Peter Warren. He had told us he would not be around today quoting a visit to the Commonwealth games Lysterfield site of the bike events for the day. Fortunately for Dennis he only stayed to watch the ladies events (a decision he will now need to explain to Joan). However he instinctively jumped into action. Was it the noble cause of assisting our President in his hour of need or was it the chance to get more money from him? We will give him the benefit of doubt and toss a coin to decide. However minutes later Peter arrived in the blue wonder wagon to collect the damaged machine and its despondent rider in an effort worthy exceeding the best the RACV could dream of on their best day.

The rest of the ride was pleasant but uneventful. We bid farewell to our members leaving next week on the trek to China and wish them a safe and happy trip. In closing I offer Chinese travel trip number 37. When you see a Western type toilet in China use it – for you will never know when you will see the next one!